Rebirth/Omen

Rebirth: Recorded live at Chitei, 25 June 2023
Omen: Recorded live at Hako Gallery, 11 January 2025

In her Twitter bio, the girl had written, “I will become a ghost on the internet.”

It was my first time performing at Chitei. The venue has a dark, almost secret-hideout-like atmosphere, with a sense of decay that resonated deeply with my emotional state at the time. The speakers were quite large relative to the space, so the sound would circulate and create feedback that doesn’t happen in other venues. By moving the microphone through the space and changing its position, the pitch and harmonics of the feedback would shift. Very few venues offer this kind of experience.

To me, feedback is like a ghost — it has no physical form, yet it undeniably exists and affects everything. It’s difficult to control, as if it’s alive. Sometimes, it even sounds like a human voice.

As you can see, my performances are deeply affected by what happens right before the show — emotionally and situationally. Because I improvise, I’m able to reflect those raw, immediate feelings. I love those moments that can only happen then and there. That’s probably one of the reasons I’m so drawn to improvisation.

Still, while Rebirth feels like being stuck in a world of confusion, Omen has a sense of release. I find it fascinating how my emotional and mental state — even the direction of my life — appears so directly in sound.

-Ayami